Read You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story by Annabelle Gurwitch Free Online
Book Title: You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story|
The author of the book: Annabelle Gurwitch
Format files: PDF
The size of the: 8.13 MB
Edition: Recorded Books, LLC
Date of issue: March 26th 2010
ISBN 13: 9781440791550
Read full description of the books You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story:
In this hilarious and ultimately moving memoir, comedians and real-life married couple Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn prove that in marriage, all you need is love—and a healthy dose of complaining, codependence, and pinot noir.
After thirteen years of being married, Annabelle and Jeff have found “We’re just not that into us.” Instead of giving up, they’ve held their relationship together by ignoring conventional wisdom and fostering a lack of intimacy, by using parenting as a competitive sport, and by dropping out of couples therapy. The he-said/she-said chronicle of their intense but loving marriage includes an unsentimental account of the medical odyssey that their family embarked upon after their infant son was diagnosed with VACTERL, a very rare series of birth defects. Annabelle and Jeff’s unforgivingly raw, uproariously funny story is sure to strike both laughter and terror in the hearts of all couples (not to mention every single man or woman who is contemplating the connubial state).
Serving up equal parts sincerity and cynicism, You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up is a laugh-out-loud must-read for everyone who has come to realize that being “in love” can only get you so far.
He says: “Within days of Annabelle’s arrival, I became very aware that she demanded solitude and had the housekeeping habits of a feral animal.”
She says: “The guy had some sort of nudity radar. When I would take my clothes off for even a second, Jeff would be in front of me cheering as if he’d scored box seats at Fenway Park.”
He says: “I want to have sex every day, but Annabelle only wants to do it once a week. So we compromise: we have sex once a week.”
She says: “Jeff says talking about money before you have sex is a turnoff, but it’s only a turnoff if you’re talking about not having money. Talking about money before you have sex when you have money is actually a turn-on.”
He says: “For God’s sake, all I wanted to do was have sex without a condom for a little while; now we were moments from bringing a new life into the world!”
She says: “My ass was expanding so fast it was like a Starbucks franchise. On every corner of my ass there was a new branch of ass opening up.”
Read information about the authorANNABELLE GURWITCH grew up hoping that she was the long lost daughter of Joni Mitchell or the reincarnation of an Egyptian princess. Neither of those things turned out to be true. She is the author of The New York Times bestseller and Thurber Prize Finalist for Humor Writing 2015, I See You Made an Effort; You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up (co-written with husband Jeff Kahn); and Fired! which was also a Showtime Comedy Special.
Annabelle was the original co-host of Dinner & a Movie for 6 seasons on TBS and host of Planet Green's WA$TED. Other acting credits include Seinfeld, Dexter, Boston Legal. Her essays and satire have appeared in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Los Angeles Times, Marie Claire, The Nation, Men's Health, Glamour, Salon.com. She was a regular commentator on NPR for numerous years and regularly performs at arts venues across the country. She is empty nesting in Los Angeles. Annabelle is a Jewish mother, a reluctant atheist, and an avid environmentalist.
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